You.

I've been thinking of you a lot, this morning,

To fight and win your love, or to give up forever.

Well, just to let you know, of what I feel,

You were in my prayers, you were in my dreams.

I've been thinking of you a lot, this morning,

For the seven hundred thousandth time again,

Well, just to let you know the state of what I am,

You're in my thought since I woke up at 4am.

Half of my heart used to think that I loved you,

Now the other half thinks you're the one.

But half of the love is all on me,

And the other half is yours, not returning.

Now how will I win the other half of this love?

When you're so pretty, when you're so smart?

Can't I even make you smile, make you happy?

Who the hell do I think I am?

Cruel it is when you stole my heart and not returning it back to me,

Cruel it is when someone else but me stole yours.

Cruel it is when my prayer to have you is not answered,

Cruel it is when I have to see you swoon over someone else.

Well, just to let you know the way of things right now,

I'm heartbroken, again, this morning.

Amzar On Fire People!

I'm currently addicted to the Led Zeppelin :B Pix from http://www.metalsucks.net/2007/12/22/saturday-song-to-get-stoned-to-led-zeppelin-achilles-last-stand/

I'm not really fond of talking about politics. In other words, politics is not my thing. Simply because both the ruling party and the opposition are (quote this from Southpark) douchebags and turd sandwiches. One is corrupt and incompetent (though not overly), the other one instead of being given the position to make actual change in four fuckin states, only barks even louder than ever. And corrupt.

But if I need to choose to save my life, I'd go with BN simply because they ACTUALLY have substance in their promises, not over the top kinda promises, which shows they know their limit and being realistic. And also ACTUAL development, though kinda slow since Mahathir retired from office. Why not PR? Cos (I know this sounds poyo but it's my blog to write, so I don't care) being trained in the investment analysis school of thought, the PR don't have any track record that inspires confidence. They only talk WITH confidence, and talking is not a tangible prove of their worth.

Oh, not to forget, economic wise, our market is attractive to investors, driven by domestic stability which if another political tsunami takes place might jeopardize the state of corporations in the country, though the rakyat have to bear with the supply-side economics practiced by bini Najib's government at the moment (inflation, increasing personal tax level, though I would naturally be angry myself if the inflation rate is above 5% which is not normal by the IMF standard, which is thankfully not the case, yet). But we're doing better than most countries, and if we ever take into consideration what a government is for, what the most basic thing they should provide, which is security - physical, economic and social - we should be utterly pleased.

But being Malaysians who have been fed with so much good things in the past got many of them wanting more, and they want ridiculous stuffs too. Oh well, human beings are naturally greedy anyway. Like the corrupt politicians we've got to bear with. They are no different. And critisizing the government is not cool anymore, it's passe', when the opposition themselves are proving to be the same douchebags as the ruling party. I wouldn't want two douchebags ruling in succession. One is enough.

By the way, I saw a friend, Amzar, in a political cyber bashing session. I have to say, I'm impressed. Click to enlarge and be marveled by his tenacity.

...who would've thought ey??

Confidential Rantings Made Public

• My guitar skills are getting rusty. I feel the urge to practice a few songs, but Football Manager 2011 is stealing my wake up time :B
• I wish I have friends whom I can have quality chat sessions with during dinner/in the car/etc. joking about stupid stuffs, doing silly things yet capable of having deep meaningful philosophical conversations instead of some gay gossips, sissy talks and nonsensical bitchy rantings. But for the time being, just appreciate with whom you're around with.
• I once had a girlfriend who I assume was fed with too much novel jiwang, was too clingy, super jealous, a kuat merajuk type and seems to demand too much attention that it can literally suck the life out of you. Simply put, she's crazy. So I broke up with her, of course, and it was like what, four years ago? And so when I saw her name in my facebook friend request, I thought she has changed into a proper person, and I approved her request. It was a mistake, she hasn't changed one bit. Her regular sappy corny statuses is enough to motivate me to hide her statuses in my newsfeed, and if ever she tries to annoy the hell out of me at fb chat again, I'm gonna have to remove her from my facebook for good. So guys, if you ever had a crazy ex girlfriend, NEVER EVER add her into your facebook/etc. cos it's not exactly the smartest thing to do.
• I fell off my bike about a week ago, got a nasty cut on my right knee. I was walking like a cripple for the past week and removing the plaster off the cut simply scared the shyte out of me. So it took me one week before I managed to find the courage to remove the plaster. And now I have some manly scar I can talk about while talking with the ladies ;P
• You know what's the scariest thing in the world? That moment when you take off that plaster off your wound. That, and being surrounded by sharks at sea, and you don't know how to swim. But removing the plaster thing is number one. :B
• I wish the creator of Football Manager football simulation game can create a game called Financial Manager. I bet I'll ace in my exams easily.
• Sex, drugs, nutella and rock n roll. Life is not complete without either one of those.
• Pete Teo is one of those rare Malaysian celebrities worth following on twitter. You learn a lot from him! I do!
• Caroline Wozniacki is a hot tennis chick. Go check her out!
• Piers Morgan is making waves on twitter and TV watching people around the world. I bet the only good thing on CNN is Piers Morgan Tonight.
• There's a 13th horoscope. I can't recall the name, but even if the new horoscope exists, I'm still a Piscean. The coolest horoscope ever!

52 Things to do in 2011

A friend of mine, at the beginning of last year created a list of 52 things he aimed to do in 2010. Theoretically, getting one item done per week every year.

They ranged from stuff such as "not shaving for a month" and "disable facebook account for an entire month" to things like "sign up to be an organ donor" and "participate in a walkathon or some kind of running event".

To those who have been following my blog and actually read it, you might have come across some posts about my own to-do list, which was a huge failure since the very idea of me interrupting the quality semester break period is not really a smart thing to do. That, and of course, the issues I have with discipline, especially during semester breaks.

This time though, I will not force myself to do everything in the list. And I don't even care if I fail to do half of them. Cos unlike the previous list, completing this one will not turn me into a proper adult. And I'm experimenting on some reverse psychology theory cos perhaps I might do better if I don't force myself too hard. :D

The list below is part stolen from my macha's blog post, Mr. Shan Vellu. And I changed them a little, of course.

1. Read 12 different books.
2. Go on a solo trip to anywhere.
3. Hitch-hike a ride.
4. Buy something from 7-Eleven every hour for 24 hours.
5. Write 12 songs.
6. Use a fire extinguisher.
7. Cook someone a proper meal.
8. Chat up one stranger each day for one week. (Bonus points if I can get their numbers).
9. Drive around early in the morning and catch the sunrise at Kuala Perlis.
10. Be mute for 24 hours.
11. Sing karaoke.
12. Beat 10 different people at chess.
13. Donate blood.
14. Go vegetarian for one week.
15. Cycle to C-Mart, buy a few stuff, and cycle back to Taman Sri Wang.
16. Not swear for 24 hours.
17. Read 12 finance magazines over the year.
18. Eat different types of dish for lunch and dinner for a week.
19. Go bald.
20. Watch a play/theater.
21. Dance in the middle of the road when the traffic lights turn red.
22. Get all A's, or a mix of A's and A- for my exams.
23. Speak proper, SPM A-1 level Bahasa Melayu for five days straight.
24. Buy something completely in coins.
25. Offer to buy a stranger a drink.
26. Don't shave for a month.
27. Not eat for an entire day.
28. Play paintball.
29. Turn off my phone for an entire week.
30. Disable my facebook account for an entire month.
31. Beat a cat at a staring contest.
32. Kiss a girl.
33. Watch a football game at a stadium.
34. Not sleep for 48 hours.
35. Send 10 random people personalised "Just Because" cards.
36. Send a message in a bottle.
37. Drive around in a pair of boxers.
38. Be on TV/newspaper/magazine.
39. Shake hand with the UiTM Perlis director.
40. Go camping.
41. Help an old/blind lady/man cross the road-ish.
42. Meet a famous person.
43. Break the UiTM law.
44. Give a street performer money.
45. Give wrong directions to people.
46. Invent a rumour.
47. Get someone to believe a made up fact.
48. Just use my left hand for a day.
49. Make some money in the stock market.
50. Go street performing for money.
51. Play Football Manager for 36 hours solid.
52. Buy a new phone.

I guess it's not too late to wish everyone a happy new year, since the Chinese one is a week plus away. So... Happy New Year folks!

The Year That Was - 2010

In keeping up with the tradition of this blog - which is to write a post to recap the stuffs that made the year memorable, as the final post of the year - I am now fending off my unnatural urge to sleep in spite of not being in the mood to blog at all.

**For future reference Zaid of the future, your sleeping pattern was disturbed and you should've been sleeping while you were posting this stuff at 9.15pm :| **

Since I'm kinda sleepy and there's not much time left until 2010 passes by under our pretty noses, I have elected to write a gung ho style post, highlighting my (somewhat deviated) journey to becoming a proper adult in 2010 into one single post. Unlike the previous years, I believe this one will be rather short. But who cares. Here goes :

January :

Malaysian politics is very colourful, it's blinding. And one of the reason was the hullabaloo surrounding the dispute whether the word Allah can be used in a Christian publication in Malaysia. I was engaged in a cyber war with a senior from my uni regarding the issue, and I was surprised as to how smart I can be in my reasoning skills. Refer to my January 8th post and marvel at my smarty-panty-ness in the dialog attached if you have a lot of time to kill.

I was also in the middle of a cross road back then, when I was contemplating to either continue

my studies in the UK, or continue my degree locally and grad one semester ear

lier. I chose the later, and I'm not regretting the decision. Though the only way now if I am to want to continue abroad is to study my ass off (again), get a stellar CGPA and do my masters there (and getting a scholarship). Masters? Yea rite...

February :

World peace is hard to achieve when there's a feeling of dislike towards one another, mutually or otherwise. And I have my own list of people I don't like in my life (aka enemies), and one of them made a return to the place he was not meant to be, where I thought I had seen the last of him a couple of months before. Need a clue? He's the closest resemblance to a swine in the whole batch physically and such an attention whore.

I had a very cool lecturer who taught me presentation skills that semester, Mr Azahari. He looks like Ramli Sarip and has a good sense of humour. I like him, I wanna be like him.

February was also the month where I genuinely fell in love with a girl while taking the train

home. She's from Kemunting.

And I discovered the joy of wintermelon juice :B

March :

I was planning to celebrate my 22nd birthday at The Curve, enjoying the tunes from Kings of Convenience as they toured to our country during my birthday. It was not to be as I had to join a "Personal Development" trip (it's a course work at the same time), and Encik Roslan Ariff will forever be remembered for taking KOC away from me.

I also discovered that Nasi Putih Daging Merah tastes like feet.

April :

Miss Syikin who taught me Corporate Finance sent me a facebook PM telling me to actually start studying during the final weeks leading up to the final exams. Kinda disturbing.

May :

I was experimenting whether discipline is part of my trait or I'm a complete asshole by dragging myself into a mess called a to-do list, which is inspired by Mike Gayle's book of the same title. Which I haven't finished reading yet. Until now. And about the list itself, it has 79 items in it, created to keep me occupied with stuffs that supposedly make me a functioning adult and to spend time better during the May/June semester break. And in spite of bringing the list forward to the Nov/Dec holiday plan, I still haven't gotten half of them settled with yet. Aih~

June :

The World Cup was boring. The Vuvuzela single handedly destroyed the World Cup with the nonsensical monotonous din coming out from the stuff for the entire 90 minutes of each game (barring the Diego Forlan goal, Uruguay vs South Africa), and the entirety of the tournament. I wasn't even bothered to watch it on TV because of the noise. The worst World Cup I've ever seen in my 22 years of living. And Italy sucked.

Then there was this problem where the UiTM server went nuts and I (and thousands

other)had to wait till the next day after the supposed date where the final exam results should came out cos of technical problems.

July :

Discovered that Nazrullah from Marketing is a super hero as he single handedly drove the legendary white Nissan (or was it a Ford?) van around Kedah/parts of Penang (air panas, air terjun, shopping mall) from Friday noon to morning the next day. The van had 15 passengers (I think) and popular belief suggests that Naz stayed up for 22 hours straight!

August :

Not much that I can remember.

September :

Got a car. Hyundai i10. Baby Milmo arrived! :D

October :

Baby Milmo's first scratch.

Second solo trip to Langkawi. And if not for Wan, the trip would've been a one day retreat to paradise. Instead, I had to spend a night there as we missed the ferry, and a few hundred ringgit more.

November :

Got a first hand experience of being a flood victim. No clean water supply forced me into taking drastic actions such as skipping baths and being stinky. And trying not to poo took it's toll too. And it all hapened during the final exams.

Wikileaks has become a diplomatic land mine as sensitive issues such as security and Anwar Ibrahim being gay are leaked.

ISP Liability Act suddenly ruffles my ass feathers and many others as the parliament might discuss it and pass the act, and rob us of internet freedom we've been enjoying for the past 10 years.

December :

Got into a fight with some Indon people on Twitter after the 3-0 drubbing of Indon by Malaysia in the first leg of the AFF Suzuki Cup and at the same time, discovered the joy of using twitter. It was fun when the most the Indon die hards could do was sitting in front of their PCs threatening to kill me with their self-consoling retorts.

Malaysia won the cup and Khairul Fahmi is now the craze of a few thousand shameless Malaysian females.

Alright now, gotta sleep. :B