Popular dishes such as the classic 'ketupat', 'lemang', 'pulut kuning' and the spicy santan-rich 'rendang ayam' to the modern day favourites like 'nasi daging with dalca', 'chocolate cake with Betty Crocker Super Fucking Sweet Choco-frostings' and 'kuih tunjuk pelbagai' are taking valuable spaces off the dining tables, coffee tables, study tables and even the stools of homes across the country. And the spaces of the country's populations' tummies aren't spared either.
This comes as no surprise as to the fact that an
outdated statistics dating back April 7th 2006 by the NST reported that a whopping 3 million Malaysians are affected with high cholesterol, with 2.1 million of them suffering from diabetes. Obese people counted for more than 25% of the country's populace. It's like saying 1 out 4 people we know are fat arse!
Therefore, in the spirit of Hari Raya, we have asked the people around on how to behave ourselves in front of the super high cholesterol yummies while doing the visits to friends' and families' open house and keep our waist size sexy.
.jpg)
Puan Azizah Rasool
KTM Operator
"Over the years I've seen those uni kids queuing for train tickets for 'balik kampong' grow 2 inches bigger when they return from
their Raya break. Their tummies bloated out of their skimpy jeans, and the cheeks look as though they're mouth are stuffed with tennis balls even though they aren't! It has been the same for 20 years now. It is high time they serve vegies and fruits instead for Hari Raya."
Zaid Mohamad
Indie Rock Star
"I can't stand watching fat people looking so haplessly tired on the mosh pit jumping like tired cows during my Raya gigs. The scene of fat women in tight jeans is as suffocating as being blank while sitting for a test in a fucking cold exam hall and you completely forgot to bring the calculator cos it has math problems in it. The food served during Raya open house should be less fattening. Moms' everywhere should look over what their children, and husbands eat. Slap their faces when they eat too much Rose Almond London."
Vengkejenkades s/o Applenaidoo
Unemployed
"Before you eat, you sing and dance. After you eat, you sing and dance again. It can burn down the calories and make you tired. Bollywood songs and dance-moves have been around for hundred of years not for nothing you know!"
p/s : Zaid of the future, during this time you have suffered from 2 super pain heart burns and even envisaged the cause of your death to be because of cholesterol.
And as usual, Raya tv is boring like hell as mak cik Siti Nurhaliza and stupid movies with tasteless jokes are conquering every tv channel there is on Astro. But this year's Raya, "Laskar Pelangi" showed that quality Raya tv is not dead, yet. A meaningful, inspirational and highly moving. I almost cried if not for my relatives being around. Lintang deserves better. And I should be grateful for what I have. Alhamdulillah...
Minal aidin wal faidzin everyone!
